When it comes to assessing whether someone has cheated up or down, it's not an easy task. We cannot truly comprehend their vantage point. However, let's delve into the logic behind this concept and attempt to gain a deeper understanding.
In relationships, we often choose a partner based on the belief that we are getting their maximum potential. This means they possess about eighty percent of the qualities we desire in a mate. This baseline becomes the standard for our expectations.
For women, finding a mate sets a new baseline. Let's say your first partner had a car. The next partner you choose must meet or exceed that baseline by having a car and something additional, such as a job. The perception here is that women cheat up, constantly seeking to expand their baseline and attract partners who offer more.
For men, the goal is to expand their "bucket" of energy by attracting more partners. This can create the perception that men cheat up. However, there's a twist. When men find a partner who aligns with their maximum potential, they commit, believing they have found everything they desire in one place. From this perspective, men cheat down when they step away from this committed relationship, seeking a partner who presents fewer challenges or headaches.
Both men and women navigate this complex landscape by employing what we call "game." It involves presenting ourselves as the maximum version of what our potential mate desires, even if we haven't fully reached that potential. By attracting partners based on our minimum, we have room to grow and impress them with our hidden qualities. This way, they appreciate us more as they discover our full potential.
Attracting a mate based on our minimum allows us to appreciate in value. As they initially perceive us as smart, attractive, and well-rounded, they are yet to witness our full potential. When they eventually discover our additional qualities, such as financial stability or domestic skills, their admiration and appreciation grow.
Men tend to pick partners based on their maximum confidence level. However, when faced with relationship challenges or overwhelming situations, they may seek partners at a lower level to reduce headaches—cheating down. On the other hand, women establish a baseline and expand their energy bucket, seeking partners who offer more to meet their evolving needs—cheating up. Employing game allows both men and women to present their minimum potential, paving the way for growth and mutual discovery.
We've all been there – that intoxicating dance of courtship, sizzling with promise. When everything aligns, it's electric! But what happens when the energy balance tips? When you can't keep her brimming with your brand of premium energy, the sparks start to flicker out. It's like a romantic power outage!
Once your love battery starts to drain, you lose ground. Suddenly, you're not standing toe-to-toe anymore. She begins to eye the big leagues - hunks she previously couldn’t spot. This energy misalignment can often lead to those forbidden ‘C’ words - Cheating and Cuckolding.
Men, let's face it, we're beasts. And when our energy overflows, we seek an outlet. Meet Eleanor – she can handle the extra juice. But she’s not your significant other, is she? You’re playing with fire, and before you know it, you’re singeing your perfectly groomed brows.
Ironically, it's your own brain that snitches on you. Post fling, you’re likely to fill your woman’s bucket with a love cocktail, mixed with a dash of something else (ahem, guilt!). It's like switching her from full-fat Coke to Diet. She'll taste the difference.
Cheating! It's like that unexpected jalapeno in your nachos – hot, surprising, and enough to ruin your taste for a while. But why does it happen? A lack of respect? Love gone stale? Or is it about the perceived shift in power dynamics? Let's dive in!
Imagine this: You’re a superwoman, juggling three kids, a job, and a degree, all while rocking a killer smile. One fine day, Cupid strikes, and bam! Mr. Right enters, no kids, loads of charm, and an average-paying job. Bliss ensues, promises get exchanged, and wedding bells chime.
Fast forward to three years later. Your fairy tale has started to lose some sparkle. Your promotion and raise at work, once a shared dream, are now catalysts for friction. The loving, fun-loving Johnny is now grumpy, lashing out at the kids, and bringing storms instead of sunshine.
When your love story started, the two of you were like the Scales of Justice, perfectly balanced. But then life happened. As you soared higher with your career, your knight started to feel like a pawn. It's as if you traded your love-tinted glasses for x-ray specs. You began to see past him, his average job, and his unfulfilled dreams.
Suddenly, Johnny seems less of a prince charming and more of a court jester. His silver no longer matches your gold, leading to resentment and frustration. It's a classic case of shifting scales tipping the love boat!
Your man may feel like he's just another one of the kids rather than the king of his castle. His self-esteem takes a hit, making him act out. Imagine this: At work, he's the man, respected, appreciated, but at home, he's being treated like a wayward teenager. It's enough to make him look for validation elsewhere.
Here's your fairy godmother advice: Make him feel like a king again. Shower him with appreciation and respect, and watch the magic unfold! For the next 30 days, treat him like the king he once was.
You'll see the transformation. First week, he'll be a skeptic. By week two, he'll be less defensive. Week three will have him warming up to you, and by the fourth week, your king will be back, ready to reign with love!
The trick is to reignite the esteem, the fourth level in Maslow's hierarchy of needs. By treating him with respect, you'll rekindle the love and emotional connection. Your king will rise to his responsibilities, love his queen, and rule his kingdom with pride and respect.